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What to do when you worry while pregnant

2/8/2014

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We all have things we are trying to avoid, things we are hoping won’t happen. It’s a normal part of facing the unknown, of preparing for a big event and transitioning. In fact, it is healthy and normal to feel afraid sometimes. It motivates us to learn new things and really prepare for all the changes and challenges that are coming our way.

When it comes to pregnancy and preparing for birth- it’s the same! Birth is a big event and most people want to prepare as best as they know how. Usually a few worries or fears will pop up along the way.

In fact, pregnant women all over the world worry! They worry about pain, their babies health and how they will cope. Some other common worries include; feeling rushed or fear of taking too long, being judged for making noise, being separated from the baby and having medical interventions. 

In the ‘Birthing From Within’ book (written by Pam England), there is a quote from a childbirth psychologist who says ‘worry is the work of pregnancy’. This may come as a surprise to some because we often believe that the women who appear relaxed and confident are the ones that birth normally. 

Pam England states that in all her years of midwifery practice, it’s the “over-confident first time mother” that worries her the most now. She worries that this mother will not be truly prepared for what awaits her.


What effect does fear have on us?

Most of us would be familiar with what happens in our bodies when we feel fear. Our heartbeat quickens, our breath becomes shallow and our muscles tense. It’s known as the fight-flight-freeze response and is combined with the release of adrenalin.


During pregnancy, repeatedly worrying can mean our muscles tighten and we may begin to hold tension in our hips, pelvic area and muscles surrounding the uterus. This can make it more difficult to open during labour.

During labour; fear will release adrenalin and this inhibits or slows the release of oxytocin (the hormone needed for birth). Labour can slow right down and even stop. Our bodies respond to adrenalin and will stop labour until it is safe to continue. Imagined fears create the same response as real threats. We may not have actual ‘tigers’ in our birth space- but the ‘tigers’ (worries) in our mind makes our body respond the same. If a woman approaches labour with unresolved fears, her body releases adrenalin and she may not easily go into labour or labour may be long and slow. Her muscles will hold more tension, and it will be harder for her uterus to contract effectively, making things more painful. 


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Are you worrying?
  • Are you trying to control everything, researching lots and creating a strict ‘birth plan’?
  • Are you avoiding ‘reading that chapter’ and/or avoiding listening to birth stories?
  • Are you only listening to ‘experts’ and/or not wanting to have expectations or hopes?

If you identified with any of the above behaviors, then it’s likely you have some worries and it would be beneficial to explore them a little.

Holistic preparation involves being ready for surprises and being brave enough to identify fears so that solutions can be found.


What can you do?

Move from fear to being free by examining your worries and finding some solutions. Take time to do the following exercise. 


Write down all your secret worries and pay particular attention to the worries that create tension in your body. Now, explore each worry by using the following questions (from Birthing From Within): 
  • What would you do if this worry/fear actually happened? What do you imagine your partner or birth attendant would do/say?
  • What would it mean about you as a mother if this happened?
  • How have you faced crisis in the past?
  • What can you do to prepare for or even prevent what you are worrying about?
  • If there’s nothing you can do to prevent it, how would you like to handle the situation?

 The good news is I can help too!

I am holding birth workshops where you can be gently guided through a process of ‘taming your tigers’ and overcoming birth worries.


Check out my antenatal classes here
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4 common questions about birth

10/13/2013

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1. Is it like the movies?

Most of us probably know by now that what’s on the TV or in the movies is usually a dramatized version of real life. Action and drama sell! It still affects us though. Especially for the children... many ideas about birth are formed early on and it’s not until adulthood that some of these beliefs are explored. I always like to ask people; where did you first hear about birth? How does this affect you today?

2. How will I cope?

Every woman is different, every baby is different and therefore every experience of birth is different. Everyone has a different way of preparing for birth. Some women have an unwavering belief that it will all be ok and go with the flow. Many women are motivated to learn about birth so that they have some tools to work with when the time comes to make the journey into ‘labour-land’. Asking yourself “What do I need to know to give birth?” can help you find some answers. Is it related to confidence? If so... ask yourself how are you nurturing confidence in yourself now, today? Start to foster the positive qualities within yourself so that when your big day comes, you will feel calmer and more confident in your ability.


3. Who can help me birth?

Just as there are many places to give birth, there are a many options for who can help you through pregnancy, birth and beyond. Obviously, having someone close to you like your partner or mother can be a blessing. Birth runs more smoothly when you feel safe and secure. Knowing your care providers and birth supporters will make a big difference to how relaxed you feel when you are birthing. Many healthy women choose to have a midwife support them during pregnancy, birth and the postnatal time. There are options called ‘case load’ or ‘continuity of care’ where the woman can have the same midwife care for her through her pregnancy and birth. When complications arise or surgery is required, then obstetricians are the specialists. 

There is a growing trend for women to also hire a doula. A doula provides emotional, physical and practical support as well as providing information/education (during pregnancy and birth). Each doula is different, but I like to address any fears/worries, help the woman discover her choices and options for birth, provide pregnancy massage and teach breath awareness (plus more!). I then support the woman for as long as she needs during early/active labour and birth. Having continual support from a trained doula can make labour shorter and easier whilst decreasing the likelihood of interventions.

Whoever you choose to support you, it’s important to discuss what it is that you are wanting and make sure your supporters are ‘on the same page’ as you. If you are not happy with your care, or don’t feel comfortable, try to find someone that you connect with.


4. Are there classes I can take?

Yes! If you would like holistic antenatal classes that help you and your partner feel more confident about birth, then I can help. I hold regular classes

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A bit about Birth & Beyond

5/31/2013

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I’ve been facilitating Nimbin Birth & Beyond for nearly 3 years now! What started out as a dream to help bring women together, connect and create a sense of community has become a reality every Wednesday evening.

We originally had a movie screening of the Big Stretch followed by a brain storm of ideas for future meetings. A LOT has happened over the last 120 or so Fridays/Wednesdays. We’ve talked about natural birth remedies, practiced breath awareness, made birth art, danced, done yoga and had guest speakers come share their knowledge. Then over the last year the “beyond” part of Birth and Beyond came into fruition and we’ve had regular mums n bubs groups. The babies have played whilst the mums have had cups of tea and talked about many things including; nappies and sleep (or lack thereof)!

Birth and Beyond is a unique community building and we are lucky to have this divine meeting space. Building a sense of community is not always easy. But in Nimbin, when such beautiful places exist, it’s a good place to start! Our library has expanded to include pregnancy, birth and parenting books and the birth pools continue to be loaned out. Really, it’s amazing and I’m glad to be a part of it all.

I love seeing the bellies blossom, women come into their power and the strong bonds form between mother and baby and then woman to woman (and baby to baby!). 


Hugs, Kirrah
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How emotional preparation helps you birth

1/5/2013

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How do you prepare for something like giving birth? Some women feel comfort in reading lots of books or searching online, some delve into it by watching movies or films and others hear stories from friends and family.

It's a pretty important day in the life of a woman and her baby (and her partner if she has one). Birth is something that will affect you for the rest of your life (not just you, but your baby and those people around you too).

I've heard of the amount of time, energy and money that women can spend on planning their weddings. Compared to this, birth preparation probably looks easy!

So, what are some options to help you emotionally prepare for birth?

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Find a pregnancy group!

Look in your local newspaper or search online to see what pregnancy groups are meeting in your town. Connect with other pregnant women (ideally with a facilitator that knows about birth) and start to hear how others are preparing for their births.

This may give you some ideas for what you would like for your birth, for example; having a water-birth, using a birth photographer or therapeutic use for your placenta. These prenatal groups can help you make new friends that may continue into parenthood (where more choices and options will arise that require discussion!).

In Nimbin, Birth & Beyond meets on Fridays 11am-12.30pm and in Lismore a new Birth & Beyond group is meeting on Tuesdays 9.30am-11.30am at Nurture.
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Hire a doula!
Having a doula is a fantastic way to help you prepare for birth. Many offer several prenatal sessions to help you discover what it is you want for your birth, what options are available and generally helping you to feel better about birthing your baby.

And, of course, they are advocates for you during the birth process. Whether you are planning to birth at home, birth center or hospital; they can be an incredible ally for you.
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Join an independent antenatal class!
These can be an incredible eye-opening experience that can help you understand your options and prepare for how your birth may look. We can never know the details of how a birth will unfold but having some tools to help you along the way will make you feel a lot better about your experience. Women who take an active role in the decision making process generally feel better about their birth outcomes (even if this is different to what they envisioned).

I hold regular Birthing From Within prenatal classes. In these workshops there is a greater focus on emotional and spiritual preparation. There is also some focus on the physiology of labour (like how your hormones help you labour and exercises that will assist your body to open). The personal exploration gives you a wider perspective and helps you gain confidence in your birthing abilities. It can also give your partner (or birth companion) more confidence to know what to do in the midst of labour.

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Let's face it, who wouldn't want to do all they can to make this journey as smooth as possible? Birth preparation is an essential part of being a responsible pregnant woman. You owe it to yourself and your baby!
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Home births: Alive and Well!

12/12/2012

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I feel blessed to have supported at two home-births in the last few weeks. The love that permeates through our homes can create a very sacred birthing space to welcome new life.

I feel that the line between normal life and a miracle unfolding becomes almost transparent in a home-birth. The progression from pregnant woman to birthing woman to mother seems so natural, yet is a divine rite of passage. And of course, not having to go anywhere, but instead friends and family coming to you can ease the transition to postpartum life.

The process of surrender that takes place in birth allows a woman to transition from maiden to mother. Through this process women can more easily embrace the ups and downs of motherhood. The strength that she discovers through birthing her baby will help empower her in times of difficulty.

“Birth helps prepare a woman for the surrendering she will do in mothering”
In the Northern Rivers, we are lucky to have some very dedicated and passionate midwives serving the needs of pregnant and birthing women. There are options of where to birth, how to birth and who to birth with. We even have some government funded home-births starting to happen through the Mullumbimby birthing centre. My hope is that this will help normalise home-births in the eye of the public and by providing financial assistance, will make it available to more people.

If you’re experiencing a healthy pregnancy, would feel more comfortable birthing in your own home and want to birth naturally (without drugs), then home-birth is a great option! A doula and midwife team can provide the perfect support to help you achieve your goals. Costs vary depending on the midwife and many offer payment plans.

If you are considering a home-birth & want to meet a dedicated home-birth midwife, get in touch with me and I can pass on their details.

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Also, you may be interested to know that as well as being a Doula, I am a Birthing From Within Mentor and I hold regular prenatal classes.

These workshops cover everything you need to know about birth and the early postnatal time. You will learn; how to use your breath to cope with intense sensations, exercises to open your mind and body, your birthing options, natural remedies for birth and postnatal, labour support skills and preparing for life with a baby. Next course will be held over 2 saturdays on the 5th and 19th January. For more information check out www.traditionalwisdom.com.au

Birth & Beyond will be having a break from 14th dec-28th dec. We will resume with gentle yoga for mums n bubs on the 4th January.

Nimbin Birth & Beyond meets every Friday from 11am-12.30pm. Sessions are run by donation. For more info (or to hold a session), make contact here. To be added to the mailing list just send an email or text.
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7 tips on how to look forward to giving birth (even if you're afraid)

10/12/2012

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Have you heard horror birth stories or seen too many dramatic TV births? It's not very confidence boosting is it? In this article, you will discover 7 tips for how to look forward to giving birth (even if you're afraid).

1. Use Birth Stories to Your Advantage
People often see pregnancy as a ticket to tell you birth stories they've experienced or heard. Everyone wants to share! Unfortunately, not all stories are positive and many can perpetuate the feelings of uncertainty or fear. One of the best tips that I can share that can help you turn these stories into something you can benefit from, is to ask the people; "What helped you cope in labour"?

This brings the focus onto the useful information and may give you tools to learn how you too can cope if unexpected or unwanted surprises pop up in your birthing journey. It reframes the story from one of negativity to one of hope and encouragement. It also helps the 'story teller' to see the positive light. Often people are telling their stories because they need to work through some aspects of it. So, quickly diverting the story to the positive or helpful information such as useful things that helped the person to cope or how they knew they could get through, can benefit all involved!  

2. Stop watching dramatic TV shows!
Instead watch positive birth films showing real people birthing. Hearing how others have conquered their fears and faced obstacles can help you build confidence in your abilities. It also helps you raise awareness about the birthing process and allows you to see solutions to questions. Some good films to check out are 'Birth as we know it', 'The Big Stretch' and 'The Business of Being Born'. 

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3. Don't overwhelm yourself with too many books!
There are many pregnancy and birth books out there (but not all are useful). A beautiful book filled with inspiring birth stories is 'Spiritual Midwifery'; written by birth expert Ina May Gaskin. This was the first 'birthy' book I ever read and I could not put it down!

An Australian book published just last year entitled 'Birth Journeys' has positive birth stories to encourage and inspire readers to look forward to birth as a rite of passage. I also highly recommend 'Birthing From Within' as an excellent guide to intuitive and emotional birth preparation.
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4. Practice Breath Awareness  
There is something so fantastic about building confidence in your ability to cope that resonates with birth preparation and self confidence. Discovering what practices help you in pregnancy, will allow you to feel better about the challenges of birth. 

The Birthing From Within childbirth preparation classes use ice-cubes to simulate an uncomfortable feeling. This gives you a gauge and sets the foundation for comparing which practices help you to cope. Try it now, hold ice for 60 seconds and see what it feels like. After you have given this a try. The next time, before holding ice, bring your awareness to your breath, focussing on your exhalation. Try focussing only on your out breath, bringing your full attention to this and then pick up the ice again, for another 60 seconds and notice any changes.
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5. Get educated; Use your brain!
Broaden your mind, expand your horizons and learn about birth. We can often fear the unknown. Knowing what your options are for birth can help you feel more in control and confident about navigating decision making.

Joining in independent prenatal classes can give you more tools to use during your pregnancy, birth and beyond. Sarah Buckley uses the acronym BRAN to help you to make an informed decision. This looks at the Benefits, Risks, Alternatives and doing Nothing (waiting longer to make a decision). Birthing From Within goes one step further and adds the letter I (for Intuition) to make the acronym BRAIN. Use your brain to discover your options and learn to navigate your unique birthing journey!
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6. Dig deep and uncover your fears
How many times have you tried NOT to think about something and that is exactly what you end up thinking about? If I was to say; do NOT think about a pineapple; what do you immediately think of? Most of you would have immediately got an image of a pineapple. 

If you are deliberately trying to avoid thinking about birth or trying NOT to think about medical intervention, then you may still be giving these things energy. An excellent way to allow fears to dissolve is to write them down, explore them and then release them. What does it say about you as a person if these fears did materialise? What steps can you take to minimise these fears from happening? What have you previously done when faced with difficult scenarios?
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7. Find Support  
Know that this is not a solo journey. Although there is a lot of self discovery and ultimately, you will be the one birthing your baby, there is still a lot of support that others can give you. Like any other big event, you will have others that you can call on to help, love and support you. Have you considered having a doula provide care during your pregnancy, birth and postnatal time?

So, to wrap up... listen to positive birth stories, ask other women what helped them cope during labour, practice breath awareness to build confidence in your abilities, get educated on your options for birth, examine your fears and find nurturing support to help you on your journey to motherhood.
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Kirrah Holborn is a doula, pregnancy masseuse, Birthing From Within childbirth educator and placenta encapsulation specialist in Northern NSW,  Australia.

She has a passion for using natural remedies and therapies to support women during pregnancy, birth and beyond. For more information see traditionalwisdom.com.au

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October Schedule at Birth & Beyond

10/10/2012

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Birth & Beyond October Schedule

12th October: Discussion on sleep

19th October: Yoga exercises that mums n bubs can enjoy together

26th October: The ‘Nappy-free’ DVD and discussion

2nd November: Belly dance for birth

P.s I'm excited to announce that I've been running Birth and Beyond for 2 years this month! Yay! Such a wonderful community asset.

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To Doula or not to Doula?

10/10/2012

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Imagine having a servant to help you with all your needs. Now imagine that this servant is a caring friend who will journey beside you through the rite of passage of becoming a mother. She may give massages, help provide resources, be a listening ear and become a friend. 

Just like people can hire tour guides for their trekking adventures, coaches for their sporting events and teachers for their studies, Doula's are the mentors and advocates of the birthing journey.


What are Doula’s?
Coming from a Greek word, Doula (pronounced doo-la) translates as ‘woman servant’ or ‘woman caregiver’. In ancient times, women always attended other women through their labour’s. This phenomenon is not new at all. Today, it is gaining popularity to seek assistance of doula's to help pregnant women (and their partner or families) during pregnancy, birth and beyond. 

Doula’s are non-medical people (often women), who understand the physical and emotional aspects of pregnancy and birth but do not have any clinical responsibilities. They are childbirth assistants that provide the woman and her partner with both emotional and physical support during the entire labour and birth and immediate postpartum period.

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What do Doula's do?
 Given that there are many hopes and fears surrounding birth, all mothers and fathers can benefit from extra emotional support and help during pregnancy and labour. Having a nurturing and experienced doula can be a calming presence in the intensity of labour. Doula’s complement the support given by husbands, partners or midwives. They are experienced in providing birth support and can focus on your emotional and physical needs (without being distracted by clinical duties). Doula’s provide a precious and unique presence for women and families, in what ever setting they choose to birth.

Doula’s believe it is the woman’s right to birth where, how and with whom she wishes. 


What are the benefits of having a doula?
Research done by Klaus et al (1993) and Hodnett et al (2011) concluded that support from a Doula enhances wellbeing of mothers and babies and leads to better outcomes.


References:
Hodnett, E. D.; Gates, S.; Hofmeyr, G. J.; Sakala, C.; Weston, J. (2011). Continuous support for women during childbirth. In Hodnett, Ellen D. "Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews". Cochrane database of systematic reviews (Online)

Klaus, M; Kennel, J; Klaus, P (1993). “Mothering the Mother; How a Doula can help you have a shorter, easier and healthier birth”. A Merloyd Lawrence Book, USA.

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Gentle yoga for mums and bubs

8/18/2012

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Check out the fun we had at Nimbin Birth and Beyond yesterday!

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Some natural remedies for Childbirth

7/11/2012

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Aromatherapy Birth Blend (for massage)

A delicious smelling blend of aromatherapy oils suitable for use during labour (do not use in pregnancy as it can stimulate contraction of the uterus).

Recipe:
100 ml of base oils (such as macadamia and camelia tea oil)

50 drops (total) of essential oils of:

clary sage (15 drops)
lavender (20 drops)
rose (8 drops)
jasmine (7 drops)
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Homeopathics
(useful as a guide, for more information speak to a homeopath)

Arnica: The remedy for any bruising, trauma or fatigue. It can be useful to help minimize cervical swelling.

Caulophyllum: Consider this remedy if induction or augmentation is being discussed. It can help the body to naturally regulate contractions (if they are irregular or not strong enough). Can help the cervix to dilate.

Pulsatilla: If labour is slow and the woman needs constant comforting and sympathy. It may help turn the baby into the best position for birthing.
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Flower Essences

Keeping ‘emergency essence’ or ‘rescue remedy’ on hand for the labouring mother and birth support people as it can help soothe tensions or anxiety.
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Massage

One of the simplest ways to help a mother relax is right at your fingertips. It is one of the oldest known remedies for helping to relax mind and body. Massage can help release natural oxytocin (the love hormone responsible for helping the uterus contract). It sends ‘feel good’ messages and helps lessen pain.

Practice massage during pregnancy to learn what the mother likes. Take one of my ‘birth support’ classes where I will teach useful birth massage techniques (such as the hip squeeze). 

Kirrah Holborn is a Doula, Birthing From Within Childbirth Educator and Pregnancy/Birth Masseuse. She has a degree in clinical science (majoring in complementary medicine). For more information about the above remedies or to learn more useful tips for helping you through labour; contact Kirrah or click on prenatal classes


This article has been compiled for educational and information purposes only. It is not intended to replace advice from your doctor, midwife or health care practitioner.
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